Blaming teachers for low test scores, poor graduation rates and the other ills of American schools has been popular lately, but a new survey wags a finger closer to home.
An Associated Press-Stanford University Poll on education found that 68 percent of adults believe parents deserve heavy blame for what's wrong with the U.S. education system - more than teachers, school administrators, the government or teachers unions.
Only 35 percent of those surveyed agreed that teachers deserve a great deal or a lot of the blame. Moms were more likely than dads - 72 percent versus 61 percent - to say parents are at fault. Conservatives were more likely than moderates or liberals to blame parents.
Those who said parents are to blame were more likely to cite a lack of student discipline and low expectations for students as serious problems in schools. They were also more likely to see fighting and low test scores as big problems.
"Nobody is too busy to raise a child for a successful future," said Wilfred Luise Vincent, 65, of Coppell, Texas. Vincent worked early or late shifts for Delta Airlines during most of his career so his two daughters would have a parent at home after school.
Now he's retired and home after school to help guide his granddaughter while his daughter works.
The problems children and their parents deal with inside and outside of school every day are growing, said Julie Woestehoff, executive director of Parents United for Responsible Education, a Chicago advocacy group.
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Children are tired, they're hungry and they need someone to help with their homework. Some kids face violence at home or in their neighborhood. Some parents are trying so hard to keep a roof over their family that they can't help with school.
More than half of those polled said student discipline and fighting, violence and gangs were extremely or very serious problems in schools. Nearly as many expressed concern about getting and keeping good teachers.
Most said education in their local public schools is excellent or good, but 67 percent also believe the U.S. is falling behind the rest of the world when it comes to education.
But a majority of parents see improvement in the system since they were in school: 55 percent believe their children are getting a better education than they did, and three-quarters rate the quality of education at their child's school as excellent or good. Most say their child's school is doing a good job preparing students for college, the work force and life as an adult.
A variety of research in past years backs up the poll respondents' sense that parenting plays key roles in school performance.
One in 10 kindergarten and first-grade students misses a month of school every year, which can put them behind their classmates for years, according to Attendance Counts, an advocacy group. By ninth grade, missing 20 percent of school is a better predictor of a student dropping out than test scores are, said Attendance Counts director Hedy Chang. In the poll, 41 percent said students not spending enough time in school is a serious problem.
Exposing kids under 2 to too much television can cause them to develop language skills later, researchers at the University of Washington have found.
Hungry students do worse on standardized tests and are absent more often, according several studies that have connected poor nutrition with students who have trouble concentrating.
Educating parents about how the school system works and welcoming them to get involved may also help their children, according to Joyce L. Epstein, research professor of sociology at Johns Hopkins University, who focuses on school, family and community partnerships.
"Without programs to educate parents, everyone is working in some stage of ignorance." Epstein said.
Some things just can't be fixed by schools or even the community, says Mike Principe, 62, of Melrose Park, a suburb of Chicago, Ill.
In addition to worrying about school violence, a lack of student discipline, low expectations for achievement, difficulty attracting good teachers and unimpressive student test scores, Principe is concerned about divorce, the economy, single parents and the national debt.
"These are tough times we're living in," Principe said. "What's our world going to be like when our 2-year-old is an adult?"
The AP-Stanford Poll on Education was conducted Sept. 23-30 by Abt SRBI, Inc. It involved interviews on landline and cellular telephones with 1,001 adults nationwide and has a margin of sampling error of plus or minus 3.9 percentage points.
Stanford's participation in this project was made possible by a grant from the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation.
___
Online:
AP polls: http://surveys.ap.org
Attendance Counts: http://www.attendancecounts.org/
Parents United for Responsible Education: http://www.pureparents.org/
Johns Hopkins University program on school partnerships: http://partnershipschools.org
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Superman as a Public School English Teacher: Day 1 (Satire)
Here's a great piece from the Huffington post!
8 a.m.: Room 321
Inside a raucous L.A. public high school classroom that will soon be brimming with a cultural, racial, and ethnic amalgam of 11th graders. The handful of bright, talented kids sprinkled throughout the class is greatly overshadowed by the majority of their academically troubled peers.
The underachievers engage in a variety of unscholarly activities. Some text away on smart phones; others watch or listen to iPods while cavorting with neighbors or sleep with their heads planted on their desks. One student self-consciously cloisters himself between his spaced-out resource aid and a wall.
Having perfected the art of subtlety, the ambitious ones wait poised (but not too poised) and ready to learn, with notebooks open and pens at the ready. These kids possess the uncanny ability to skim notes or read passages without appearing as though they care too much.
The first-period late bell blares as stragglers file in. Half the desks in class are devoid of students; in 20 minutes, there won't be enough seats to accommodate them all.
The sound of bending, twisting metal pierces through the ambient clamor. It comes from outside; all activity freezes as students turn to the commotion.
A beefed-up mountain of a man, clad in red cape, matching boots, and a bright blue uni-tard, emblazoned with the letter "S" across the chest, pries open the bars on the classroom window. With a flick of his fingers, he smashes through the windowpane, squeezes his body through the widened bars, and glides deftly and safely onto the classroom floor.
For the moment, the students of Room 321 sit in rapt silence. They realize this man is no mere mortal: This... is Superman. With one elegant swipe, the storied Man of Steel dusts himself free of glass chards, chipped paint and asbestos shavings, then swaggers to the front of the class.
Superman: Greetings, youngsters!
The great Superman pauses for a fawning reception, which never materializes.
SM: How did you all get in here?
Stephanie Rolls her eyes and then checks her phone for an incoming text.
Stephanie: The door. Custodian opened it.
Superman: Ah, mortals. Always taking the easy way!
Superman forces an awkward smile. Seconds removed from his grand entrance, most students have already lost interest. Several even fall back to sleep. The clackety-clack of texting resumes, followed by the hum of teenage voices.
SM: So word has it you've all been "waiting" for me.
Superman emits a booming superhero chuckle, which is all but ignored by his new charges.
SM: But no -- seriously...
Undeterred, Superman presses on with his trademark good-natured aplomb. He breaks down into an athletic crouch.
SM: Okay! So who's ready to learn, Justice League-style?
Two boys shuffle in and obliviously cut in front of the greatest superhero of all time. One of them flops down into his seat and immediately falls asleep; the other exchanges sleepy fist-bumps with his cronies, en route to his seat. A bemused Superman turns to the fist-bumper.
SM: Excuse me: young man?
A girl -- Tanya -- raises her hand but doesn't wait to be called on.
Tanya: Why are you wearing a leotard, Mister?
SM: This is no leotard, young lady. It's a two-billion-thread-count impermeable sheath, manufactured on the planet Krypton and blessed by the high priestess Tiarlactra. It's amalgamated from 80,000 different materials, only a fraction of which are found on earth.
Arman reaches over and pinches out an inch of fabric.
SM: Hey!
Arman: It's a leotard.
Somebody's cell ring tone activates, to the tune of Lil Wayne's "Got Money."
SM: Sorry, but I'm going to have to ask each of you to please disable all cordless communications devices, as well as any personal radios.
Ignoring the directive, Angel casually answers his cell phone.
SM: (to Angel) Excuse me, young man? Young man! I just got finished --
Angel: (Into his phone) Hold up. (to Superman) Sorry, I gotta get this.
SM: No, sir, You most certainly do not.
Superman reaches to confiscate the phone; Angel recoils.
SM: Young man!
Angel indignantly stashes the phone inside his knapsack.
Angel: There! Happy? Damn!
Angel "mad-dogs" the once unsinkable Man of Steel, who struggles to regain his composure.
SM: Now then: Let's get down to work, shall we? It says here your assignment for today was to compose a one-page critique of F. Scott Fitzgerald's writing style for the first three chapters of The Great Gatsby. So let me have everyone's paper, and then we can get started with the business of some California Standards Test preparation.
Only a smattering of students produce their homework. They're clearly nervous about standing out among their underachieving classmates.
SM: Go ahead and pass your papers to the front of the class. Don't be shy now.
Several papers, in various stages of decimation, trickle to the front of the class.
SM: Looks like we're missing some compositions here...
Sleeping at the back of the classroom, Moises lifts his head long enough to say:
Moises: The Great Gatsby sucks.
SM: It's a classic piece of American literature.
Moises: (putting head back down) And it sucks.
Nearby, DeShaun and Jesus pause from their GT Racing battle on DeShaun's iPhone.
DeShaun: It's boring as hell.
Jesus: Yeah, I don't get it.
SM: (turning to Jesus) Hmm. What exactly don't you get about it, son?
Jesus: All of it.
SM: Could you be more specific?
Jesus: No.
SM: Well, then here's what we'll do: let's take out our books, and we'll figure it out together. Everyone go ahead and turn to page... 42.
Superman thumbs through his copy of Gatsby.
SM: Ah! OK: I think I can see what might be the problem here. So in this section...
Superman glances up to see that only a handful of students have their books out and open; the rest have resumed their pre-class activities. The noise level spikes.
SM: Ladies and gentlemen? Ladies and gentlemen!
Superman's voice is barely audible above the din. The most omnipotent superhero in the universe is rapidly losing control of his class. He surveys the landscape, searching for a way to employ his superpowers and salvage his legacy. Out of options, he unleashes a surprisingly high-pitched scream.
SM: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! Please take out your copies of The Great Gatsby... NOW!
Silence, followed by a sea of empty stares. Taking a respite from gazing into her makeup compact, Brenda raises her hand.
Brenda: Can't we just have a free day?
SM: Absolutely not. The semester's already half over, so there's no time to waste. Everyone who doesn't have a book, look on with a neighbor. Those of you with a book, turn to page 42, and we'll read aloud together. So who wants to get us started?
Superman scans the room for anyone half-willing to read aloud, but somehow all 40-plus students avert eye contact -- except for Garrett, who sheepishly raises his hand.
Garrett: I'll read.
Eyes roll, heads plummet. These kids know something Superman doesn't: While Garrett likes to read, he does so at a third-grade level.
SM: Great! Please, go ahead.
Garrett: The eyes of Doctor T.J. Eck...Uh...
SM: Eckleburg. That's important -- remember that name, kids. Keep reading, son.
Garrett: Um... are blue and juh... juh...
SM: Gigantic. They are blue and they are gigantic. Excellent. Keep going.
Some students groan; others mutter to themselves or shift restlessly in their seats.
DeShaun: Can't we just do test prep?
Jesus: Dude, you hate that shit.
DeShaun: (to Jesus) Would you rather fake-bubble the rest of the period, or talk about some T.J. Eckleheimer fool?
Jesus: Neither. I'd rather watch the rest of Blindside. Where's that other sub at?
SM: (to Garrett) Keep going, son. You're doing just fine.
But before Garrett can proceed, the school fire alarm activates -- at a volume and pitch that might best be described as "agonizing." Students instinctively cover their ears and pop out of their seats. Once again, class grinds to a halt.
SM: SIT DOWN!
Miraculously, everyone listens to Superman and returns to their seats. He shouts at peak volume to be heard above the racket.
SM: DON'T PANIC! EVERYONE GRAB YOUR THINGS AND FOLLOW ME!
The alarm stops. A crackling adult voice chimes in over the intercom.
Intercom Voice: Teachers: please disregard the fire alarm. I repeat, please disregard the fire alarm. And students: take note that anyone who knowingly triggers a false alarm will be given one full week of campus beautification. Thank you.
Garrett raises his hand.
Garrett: Can I keep reading?
Robert stirs restlessly in the back of class.
Robert: Oh, no!
SM: Actually, why don't we give someone else a chance...
Superman turns to Robert and cracks a wry smile.
SM: All right, son. Sounds like you're hankering to showcase your reading skills. Go right ahead.
Robert: Heeeells no! And I ain't your son.
SM: So let me get this straight: Even though you won't try, you find that it's okay to critique others?
Robert: What's critique mean?
Arturo lurches forward in his seat, his face barely popping through an XXXL hoodie.
Arturo: Yeah, why do you gotta keep using all these big words. Just talk normal.
Superman unwittingly commits his first teacherly sin: The patented eye roll.
SM: When you critique, you're giving your opinions on something you've analyzed.
Robert: Then I critique this class to be boring and stupid.
SM: Fine. If it's such a waste of your time, you can leave.
Robert: For real?
SM: If you think that's the wisest choice for your future, sure.
Calling his new teacher's bluff, Robert gets up and exits. Superman struggles to mask his consternation.
Garrett: Now can I read?
SM: Uh... sure. Please continue.
Garrett: ...Their ret... ret...
Anonymous Kid: Retards!
SM: Who said that? Don't say that!
It's impossible to identify the culprit. Several students break out into hyena-like laughter.
SM: The word is retinas. It's part of the surface of the eye. Keep going, son. Doing just fine.
Garrett: ... retinas... are one yard high. They look out of no face but, instead, from a pair of...e normous yellow spec... spectacles.
SM: Good! So what are we looking at here? What might this image represent in the story? In other words, why would the author take all this time to describe this creepy, old billboard? Why? Come on, even if you haven't read this part yet -- think.
While a few more casualties of boredom and apathy plop their heads on their desks, several students look as though they might be poised to volunteer possible answers. One kid even begins to raise his hand -- but he's interrupted by yet another frazzled intercom announcement.
Intercom: Teachers and students: we have an important message for all girls frosh-soph cheer candidates. Girls' JV cheer tryouts have been rescheduled from this coming Tuesday to this coming Wednesday on the main field near the big gym. Please adjust your schedules accordingly. Thank you.
SM: (nonplused) OK, so again: Why does Fitzgerald want us to care about the eyes of T.J. Eckleberg?
Diana shoots up her hand.
SM: Yes! The young lady in the light blue blouse!
Diana: Can I go to the bathroom?
SM: Is it an emergency?
Diana: No.
SM: Then no.
Arpine raises her hand.
Arpine: Can we have our old teacher back?
Arpine looks two seats over at Arman for affirmation.
Arman: Yeah, we want Ms. Hamlisch.
Tanya: (to Arman) Damn, you don't have to be rude about it.
SM: Thank you young lady, but I think it's time I leveled with you kids. The district brought me in because they said your test scores were poor and that you lacked motivation. Then they told me your teachers were also mailing it in and that this school had become a dropout factory. They said you needed someone who could come in and bring up your test scores immediately, that you needed someone better than a teacher.
Arturo: But you can't even figure out how to use a door.
Arturo's snap elicits a wave of "oohs" and "ahhs" from his classmates.
SM: Fine. I get it. None of you likes me.
Angel: You got that right.
Stephanie: Speak for yourself, dummy.
SM: The point is, we all have a job to do, right here and now. You know what? Forget Gatsby. Instead, go home tonight and find a newspaper article that interests you. Read it in its entirety, then write a one-page response. In your paper, give your reactions to everything that's going on in that article -- the good, the bad, and how it makes you feel overall.
Jesus: Can it be sports?
SM: Sports, world affairs, local, politics, entertainment, whatever. As long as it's published in a legitimate newspaper, it's fair game.
Moises: Does it have to be in English?
SM: Preferably, yes.
Diana: Can it be from the TV news?
SM: No. I want you to read something.
Garrett: What if you don't get the newspaper?
SM: Access one online. Just Google Search the name of the newspaper. OK, then...
The bell rings. In one big, amorphous mass, the class gets up to leave. But Tanya lags behind.
Tanya: Superperson?
SM: It's Superman. What can I do for you, young lady?
Tanya: Yeah, um, I don't get the newspaper. And I don't have Internet.
With his super-cognition, Superman can discern that Tanya's telling the honest truth. He tries to hide his sadness.
SM: Uh... then how about you do a write-up of the last book you read?
Tanya: I've never read a full-on book -- all the way 'till the end, I mean. I read most of Goosebumps, but that was like in sixth grade.
SM: Well, then... what was the last movie you watched?
Tanya: Hostel 2.
SM: Doesn't quite ring a bell... Oh, what the hay: just go ahead and write up your reaction to that then -- like a film review. Have you ever read a film review?
Tanya: Uh-uh.
SM: Basically, just explain whether or not you thought the movie was entertaining and interesting, or if it was disappointing or boring -- or perhaps even both. OK?
Tanya nods unconvincingly. She leaves right as a new wave of students rumble in for the start of second period. Superman's virtually unaware of the incoming group. Instead, he stares forlornly out the door, watching Tanya disappear into a sea of her peers. And the reality hits him: She won't do it.
Inside a raucous L.A. public high school classroom that will soon be brimming with a cultural, racial, and ethnic amalgam of 11th graders. The handful of bright, talented kids sprinkled throughout the class is greatly overshadowed by the majority of their academically troubled peers.
The underachievers engage in a variety of unscholarly activities. Some text away on smart phones; others watch or listen to iPods while cavorting with neighbors or sleep with their heads planted on their desks. One student self-consciously cloisters himself between his spaced-out resource aid and a wall.
Having perfected the art of subtlety, the ambitious ones wait poised (but not too poised) and ready to learn, with notebooks open and pens at the ready. These kids possess the uncanny ability to skim notes or read passages without appearing as though they care too much.
The first-period late bell blares as stragglers file in. Half the desks in class are devoid of students; in 20 minutes, there won't be enough seats to accommodate them all.
The sound of bending, twisting metal pierces through the ambient clamor. It comes from outside; all activity freezes as students turn to the commotion.
A beefed-up mountain of a man, clad in red cape, matching boots, and a bright blue uni-tard, emblazoned with the letter "S" across the chest, pries open the bars on the classroom window. With a flick of his fingers, he smashes through the windowpane, squeezes his body through the widened bars, and glides deftly and safely onto the classroom floor.
For the moment, the students of Room 321 sit in rapt silence. They realize this man is no mere mortal: This... is Superman. With one elegant swipe, the storied Man of Steel dusts himself free of glass chards, chipped paint and asbestos shavings, then swaggers to the front of the class.
Superman: Greetings, youngsters!
The great Superman pauses for a fawning reception, which never materializes.
SM: How did you all get in here?
Stephanie Rolls her eyes and then checks her phone for an incoming text.
Stephanie: The door. Custodian opened it.
Superman: Ah, mortals. Always taking the easy way!
Superman forces an awkward smile. Seconds removed from his grand entrance, most students have already lost interest. Several even fall back to sleep. The clackety-clack of texting resumes, followed by the hum of teenage voices.
SM: So word has it you've all been "waiting" for me.
Superman emits a booming superhero chuckle, which is all but ignored by his new charges.
SM: But no -- seriously...
Undeterred, Superman presses on with his trademark good-natured aplomb. He breaks down into an athletic crouch.
SM: Okay! So who's ready to learn, Justice League-style?
Two boys shuffle in and obliviously cut in front of the greatest superhero of all time. One of them flops down into his seat and immediately falls asleep; the other exchanges sleepy fist-bumps with his cronies, en route to his seat. A bemused Superman turns to the fist-bumper.
SM: Excuse me: young man?
A girl -- Tanya -- raises her hand but doesn't wait to be called on.
Tanya: Why are you wearing a leotard, Mister?
SM: This is no leotard, young lady. It's a two-billion-thread-count impermeable sheath, manufactured on the planet Krypton and blessed by the high priestess Tiarlactra. It's amalgamated from 80,000 different materials, only a fraction of which are found on earth.
Arman reaches over and pinches out an inch of fabric.
SM: Hey!
Arman: It's a leotard.
Somebody's cell ring tone activates, to the tune of Lil Wayne's "Got Money."
SM: Sorry, but I'm going to have to ask each of you to please disable all cordless communications devices, as well as any personal radios.
Ignoring the directive, Angel casually answers his cell phone.
SM: (to Angel) Excuse me, young man? Young man! I just got finished --
Angel: (Into his phone) Hold up. (to Superman) Sorry, I gotta get this.
SM: No, sir, You most certainly do not.
Superman reaches to confiscate the phone; Angel recoils.
SM: Young man!
Angel indignantly stashes the phone inside his knapsack.
Angel: There! Happy? Damn!
Angel "mad-dogs" the once unsinkable Man of Steel, who struggles to regain his composure.
SM: Now then: Let's get down to work, shall we? It says here your assignment for today was to compose a one-page critique of F. Scott Fitzgerald's writing style for the first three chapters of The Great Gatsby. So let me have everyone's paper, and then we can get started with the business of some California Standards Test preparation.
Only a smattering of students produce their homework. They're clearly nervous about standing out among their underachieving classmates.
SM: Go ahead and pass your papers to the front of the class. Don't be shy now.
Several papers, in various stages of decimation, trickle to the front of the class.
SM: Looks like we're missing some compositions here...
Sleeping at the back of the classroom, Moises lifts his head long enough to say:
Moises: The Great Gatsby sucks.
SM: It's a classic piece of American literature.
Moises: (putting head back down) And it sucks.
Nearby, DeShaun and Jesus pause from their GT Racing battle on DeShaun's iPhone.
DeShaun: It's boring as hell.
Jesus: Yeah, I don't get it.
SM: (turning to Jesus) Hmm. What exactly don't you get about it, son?
Jesus: All of it.
SM: Could you be more specific?
Jesus: No.
SM: Well, then here's what we'll do: let's take out our books, and we'll figure it out together. Everyone go ahead and turn to page... 42.
Superman thumbs through his copy of Gatsby.
SM: Ah! OK: I think I can see what might be the problem here. So in this section...
Superman glances up to see that only a handful of students have their books out and open; the rest have resumed their pre-class activities. The noise level spikes.
SM: Ladies and gentlemen? Ladies and gentlemen!
Superman's voice is barely audible above the din. The most omnipotent superhero in the universe is rapidly losing control of his class. He surveys the landscape, searching for a way to employ his superpowers and salvage his legacy. Out of options, he unleashes a surprisingly high-pitched scream.
SM: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! Please take out your copies of The Great Gatsby... NOW!
Silence, followed by a sea of empty stares. Taking a respite from gazing into her makeup compact, Brenda raises her hand.
Brenda: Can't we just have a free day?
SM: Absolutely not. The semester's already half over, so there's no time to waste. Everyone who doesn't have a book, look on with a neighbor. Those of you with a book, turn to page 42, and we'll read aloud together. So who wants to get us started?
Superman scans the room for anyone half-willing to read aloud, but somehow all 40-plus students avert eye contact -- except for Garrett, who sheepishly raises his hand.
Garrett: I'll read.
Eyes roll, heads plummet. These kids know something Superman doesn't: While Garrett likes to read, he does so at a third-grade level.
SM: Great! Please, go ahead.
Garrett: The eyes of Doctor T.J. Eck...Uh...
SM: Eckleburg. That's important -- remember that name, kids. Keep reading, son.
Garrett: Um... are blue and juh... juh...
SM: Gigantic. They are blue and they are gigantic. Excellent. Keep going.
Some students groan; others mutter to themselves or shift restlessly in their seats.
DeShaun: Can't we just do test prep?
Jesus: Dude, you hate that shit.
DeShaun: (to Jesus) Would you rather fake-bubble the rest of the period, or talk about some T.J. Eckleheimer fool?
Jesus: Neither. I'd rather watch the rest of Blindside. Where's that other sub at?
SM: (to Garrett) Keep going, son. You're doing just fine.
But before Garrett can proceed, the school fire alarm activates -- at a volume and pitch that might best be described as "agonizing." Students instinctively cover their ears and pop out of their seats. Once again, class grinds to a halt.
SM: SIT DOWN!
Miraculously, everyone listens to Superman and returns to their seats. He shouts at peak volume to be heard above the racket.
SM: DON'T PANIC! EVERYONE GRAB YOUR THINGS AND FOLLOW ME!
The alarm stops. A crackling adult voice chimes in over the intercom.
Intercom Voice: Teachers: please disregard the fire alarm. I repeat, please disregard the fire alarm. And students: take note that anyone who knowingly triggers a false alarm will be given one full week of campus beautification. Thank you.
Garrett raises his hand.
Garrett: Can I keep reading?
Robert stirs restlessly in the back of class.
Robert: Oh, no!
SM: Actually, why don't we give someone else a chance...
Superman turns to Robert and cracks a wry smile.
SM: All right, son. Sounds like you're hankering to showcase your reading skills. Go right ahead.
Robert: Heeeells no! And I ain't your son.
SM: So let me get this straight: Even though you won't try, you find that it's okay to critique others?
Robert: What's critique mean?
Arturo lurches forward in his seat, his face barely popping through an XXXL hoodie.
Arturo: Yeah, why do you gotta keep using all these big words. Just talk normal.
Superman unwittingly commits his first teacherly sin: The patented eye roll.
SM: When you critique, you're giving your opinions on something you've analyzed.
Robert: Then I critique this class to be boring and stupid.
SM: Fine. If it's such a waste of your time, you can leave.
Robert: For real?
SM: If you think that's the wisest choice for your future, sure.
Calling his new teacher's bluff, Robert gets up and exits. Superman struggles to mask his consternation.
Garrett: Now can I read?
SM: Uh... sure. Please continue.
Garrett: ...Their ret... ret...
Anonymous Kid: Retards!
SM: Who said that? Don't say that!
It's impossible to identify the culprit. Several students break out into hyena-like laughter.
SM: The word is retinas. It's part of the surface of the eye. Keep going, son. Doing just fine.
Garrett: ... retinas... are one yard high. They look out of no face but, instead, from a pair of...e normous yellow spec... spectacles.
SM: Good! So what are we looking at here? What might this image represent in the story? In other words, why would the author take all this time to describe this creepy, old billboard? Why? Come on, even if you haven't read this part yet -- think.
While a few more casualties of boredom and apathy plop their heads on their desks, several students look as though they might be poised to volunteer possible answers. One kid even begins to raise his hand -- but he's interrupted by yet another frazzled intercom announcement.
Intercom: Teachers and students: we have an important message for all girls frosh-soph cheer candidates. Girls' JV cheer tryouts have been rescheduled from this coming Tuesday to this coming Wednesday on the main field near the big gym. Please adjust your schedules accordingly. Thank you.
SM: (nonplused) OK, so again: Why does Fitzgerald want us to care about the eyes of T.J. Eckleberg?
Diana shoots up her hand.
SM: Yes! The young lady in the light blue blouse!
Diana: Can I go to the bathroom?
SM: Is it an emergency?
Diana: No.
SM: Then no.
Arpine raises her hand.
Arpine: Can we have our old teacher back?
Arpine looks two seats over at Arman for affirmation.
Arman: Yeah, we want Ms. Hamlisch.
Tanya: (to Arman) Damn, you don't have to be rude about it.
SM: Thank you young lady, but I think it's time I leveled with you kids. The district brought me in because they said your test scores were poor and that you lacked motivation. Then they told me your teachers were also mailing it in and that this school had become a dropout factory. They said you needed someone who could come in and bring up your test scores immediately, that you needed someone better than a teacher.
Arturo: But you can't even figure out how to use a door.
Arturo's snap elicits a wave of "oohs" and "ahhs" from his classmates.
SM: Fine. I get it. None of you likes me.
Angel: You got that right.
Stephanie: Speak for yourself, dummy.
SM: The point is, we all have a job to do, right here and now. You know what? Forget Gatsby. Instead, go home tonight and find a newspaper article that interests you. Read it in its entirety, then write a one-page response. In your paper, give your reactions to everything that's going on in that article -- the good, the bad, and how it makes you feel overall.
Jesus: Can it be sports?
SM: Sports, world affairs, local, politics, entertainment, whatever. As long as it's published in a legitimate newspaper, it's fair game.
Moises: Does it have to be in English?
SM: Preferably, yes.
Diana: Can it be from the TV news?
SM: No. I want you to read something.
Garrett: What if you don't get the newspaper?
SM: Access one online. Just Google Search the name of the newspaper. OK, then...
The bell rings. In one big, amorphous mass, the class gets up to leave. But Tanya lags behind.
Tanya: Superperson?
SM: It's Superman. What can I do for you, young lady?
Tanya: Yeah, um, I don't get the newspaper. And I don't have Internet.
With his super-cognition, Superman can discern that Tanya's telling the honest truth. He tries to hide his sadness.
SM: Uh... then how about you do a write-up of the last book you read?
Tanya: I've never read a full-on book -- all the way 'till the end, I mean. I read most of Goosebumps, but that was like in sixth grade.
SM: Well, then... what was the last movie you watched?
Tanya: Hostel 2.
SM: Doesn't quite ring a bell... Oh, what the hay: just go ahead and write up your reaction to that then -- like a film review. Have you ever read a film review?
Tanya: Uh-uh.
SM: Basically, just explain whether or not you thought the movie was entertaining and interesting, or if it was disappointing or boring -- or perhaps even both. OK?
Tanya nods unconvincingly. She leaves right as a new wave of students rumble in for the start of second period. Superman's virtually unaware of the incoming group. Instead, he stares forlornly out the door, watching Tanya disappear into a sea of her peers. And the reality hits him: She won't do it.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Courts Begin Fining Rural Parents If Children Skip School
This logically leads to the conclusion that most of us realize, but fail to acknowledge publicly: great teachers still need parent partners who ensure that (1) students attend school, (2) students study, and (3) students complete assignments.
If I were to require the services of the greatest, world-class medical experts in existence, all their endeavors would be fruitless IF I refused to do as they prescribed. It would be a waste of my time and money, as well as theirs. And what if the consequences of failing to follow this advice were so great that they led to my death? Should my family then sue the doctors? Such an idea would surely be laughed out of court.
Likewise, it is difficult to reconcile how evil, "over paid" teachers, with students who actively refuse to follow instructions to study and do well in school, are the root cause of the demise of the American public education system.
If you refuse to follow the directions of your doctor, it could cost you your life. If you refuse to follow the directions of your teacher, it could cost you the QUALITY of your life. It's that simple.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
An "Uptick" In The Science Scores!
A new article is out heralding the "uptick" of science scores in the United States as compared to the students of other industrialized nations.
Here in the land of celebrated mediocrity, the most menial of improvements are trotted out as "good news." Sure, we have an "uptick" in science scores, but we are still 25th out of 34 nations in math, and we are still very far behind Asian countries, and, well, almost any country with a reliable electrical grid (we're even behind some that don't!).
An even sadder truth in the U.S. is how the importance of education measures up to, oh, let's say our national obsession: sports. Imagine the complete, total humiliation that would be felt if the U.S. finished 25th out of 34 in the Olympics? Imagine the nationwide shame if Canadian teams won the World Series for 30 years in a row. But education? Pffff...NERDS! Who cares about stupid school?
Why is this true? Because in the countries currently beating the stuffing out of us, the idea that education is important is more than a campaign slogan. It is a cultural truth. It is a truth known by students who witness everyday the humdrum, peasant-like quality of life that awaits those who do not take their studies seriously and find themselves shackled to slave wage labor jobs. You think school is boring in China? That's fine. Put up your books, the rice fields are over there. Hǎo yùnqì! (good luck!)
Not too long ago, President Obama traveled to South Korea and happened to ask the South Korean prime minister, "In America, we are having trouble with education. What do you find to be the most challenging aspect of education in your country?" According to the President, the prime minister replied, "That the biggest education challenge he had was an insistence, a demand from parents for excellence in the schools."
When, and only when, the United States has a family unit with parents that insist upon the same high standards will we make any headway. Until most parents, and not just some, work with teachers to ensure that students are studying and practicing the math/science/reading skills necessary to be competitive in the 21st century...NO OTHER REFORM will be effective.
But in case this doesn't happen, and it probably won't, let's all practice a new patriotic cheer, much like what one hears at the Olympics: "USA...USA...USA...we're number 25.....USA...USA....we're number 25."
Just doesn't have the same ring, does it?
An even sadder truth in the U.S. is how the importance of education measures up to, oh, let's say our national obsession: sports. Imagine the complete, total humiliation that would be felt if the U.S. finished 25th out of 34 in the Olympics? Imagine the nationwide shame if Canadian teams won the World Series for 30 years in a row. But education? Pffff...NERDS! Who cares about stupid school?
Why is this true? Because in the countries currently beating the stuffing out of us, the idea that education is important is more than a campaign slogan. It is a cultural truth. It is a truth known by students who witness everyday the humdrum, peasant-like quality of life that awaits those who do not take their studies seriously and find themselves shackled to slave wage labor jobs. You think school is boring in China? That's fine. Put up your books, the rice fields are over there. Hǎo yùnqì! (good luck!)
Not too long ago, President Obama traveled to South Korea and happened to ask the South Korean prime minister, "In America, we are having trouble with education. What do you find to be the most challenging aspect of education in your country?" According to the President, the prime minister replied, "That the biggest education challenge he had was an insistence, a demand from parents for excellence in the schools."
When, and only when, the United States has a family unit with parents that insist upon the same high standards will we make any headway. Until most parents, and not just some, work with teachers to ensure that students are studying and practicing the math/science/reading skills necessary to be competitive in the 21st century...NO OTHER REFORM will be effective.
But in case this doesn't happen, and it probably won't, let's all practice a new patriotic cheer, much like what one hears at the Olympics: "USA...USA...USA...we're number 25.....USA...USA....we're number 25."
Just doesn't have the same ring, does it?
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Unemployment is up! Yay!
At face value, one might wonder how I could be so insensitive, so crass. But I am confident that, in terms of our under-18 citizens, a higher unemployment rate might shove this generation toward a shift in how they view school. A shift that moves away from, "School sucks...I'm bored...this is stupid...my mommy will take care of me when I'm 30" to, "I want a higher quality of life, and to get it I must take school seriously, do my assignments, and study."
Recently, I was listening to NPR's "All Things Considered" as a guest explained that while the unemployment rate is 9.6%, for people who finished college, the unemployment rate is a much less terrifying 4.7%. For high school dropouts, the unemployment rate approaches 20%.
Grandmother's and grandfather's who lived through the Great Depression watched their parents learn from their terrifying experience. While the pain and suffering of the Depression was great, so to were some of the changes to American society that were direct results of the misery. Personal savings rates rose, increased government regulation was introduced to curtail much of the wild Wall Street speculation, and many people in high school, according to a retired Los Alamos scientist I once met, decided, "Well...I'm not going to get a job, so I might as well go to college and ride this thing out." This in turn led to many Americans with advanced degrees and research experience at the time the "Sputnik Incident" occurred, thereby ensuring that the U.S. would have a large pool of talent to draw upon as it waged a science and technology battle with the U.S.S.R.
As of now, back in 2010, nerds are still made fun of and "too-cool-for-school" kids are still the ones that are, well, cool. Unemployment is high, we are losing a technology battle with China and other countries, and the American education system is full of little cherubs who couldn't care less about the happenings on any cloud but their own. Perhaps a little journey out into the job jungle will scare our students straight...straight onto a college campus.
I don't really wish for the unemployment rate to skyrocket. I just wish for a cultural shift in how the importance of education is perceived. But if it takes our country becoming a third-world country in order to spur students to action, then I'm all for it....of course, by then, I'll be teaching in China.
Friday, December 3, 2010
Krazy Things Kids Say - Part I of ?
The current deluge of 3-D films at the box office has me, well, like the movies themselves, nauseous. I understand it's cool. Yes, the technology is fabulous. Ok...ok, some movies are indeed better in 3D. But really? Must every movie be released in 3-D? Since past behavior is always a great indicator of future behavior, I'll have to research how long the first 3-D fad lasted in the 50s, and then bide my time accordingly.
However, this story is not really about the overly prolific 3-D format. Instead, I would like to focus on a mind-boggling comment I overheard from a typical American, middle-school aged, PFY (pimply-faced youth) while leaving a 3-D movie. Like poker players who have tells, but think they do not, if one is observant around 13 year-olds, one can often learn more than what is actually said. As I was leaving the newest, and 3-D, installment of Jackass, I overheard the aforementioned PFY say, seriously....with intent....and a straight face, "Dude, that was, like, so cool! Wouldn't it, like, be awesome if real life was, like, 3-D?"
Yes, indeed. Wouldn't it be cool?
However, this story is not really about the overly prolific 3-D format. Instead, I would like to focus on a mind-boggling comment I overheard from a typical American, middle-school aged, PFY (pimply-faced youth) while leaving a 3-D movie. Like poker players who have tells, but think they do not, if one is observant around 13 year-olds, one can often learn more than what is actually said. As I was leaving the newest, and 3-D, installment of Jackass, I overheard the aforementioned PFY say, seriously....with intent....and a straight face, "Dude, that was, like, so cool! Wouldn't it, like, be awesome if real life was, like, 3-D?"
Yes, indeed. Wouldn't it be cool?
Sunday, November 28, 2010
New Jersey Governor Chris Christie and YouTube Trolls
Early this morning, for some reason now lost to my advanced stages of ADD, a conversation started between my wife, my 11 year-old daughter, and I, concerning education (always a hot topic in our house, I guess). Our daughter had overheard me mention to my wife, "Wait until they extend the school year." With a horrified look on her face, not unlike what one might see if she had witnessed her cat being slowly crushed by a tracked military vehicle of some sort, my daughter looked up and said, "But WHY?!? Why would they do such a thing?"
And then began the explanation to an 11 year-old of how students from other countries in the world were fairing better than American students at math, science, reading, geography...well...every subject you can think of.
I exclaimed, "It is going to be very entertaining over the next 3-5 years, watching these imbeciles desperately grasp for magic-bullet solutions....false solutions such as extending the school year." (Finland and others ahead of us already go fewer days, not more, than American pupils. They also spend less money per student.) "Yes, all of the 'reforms' will aim at everything but the culprit of causality, and that is why they will all fail. For the real culprit is the total, complete, disdain, and venomous vitriol that people in this country have for education in general, and teachers in particular. What is 'broken' about education in this country, is the culture that surrounds it."
And so I headed to YouTube to reinforce what I already knew. Take a character named HuncleMike, posting in response to a video featuring Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey (if you search the good Governor's name and the word teacher, you will see how highly he values public school teachers). At the bottom of the video linked to this blog, HuncleMike states:
"Rita Wilson could benefit from a few months of starvation. She claims,"we love it, we love to teach" TRANSLATION: We love summers off, we love the ridiculous benefits, we love short work days, we love every blessed holiday off...most teachers I know bitch NONSTOP about how tough they have it."
This, friends, is the picture people have of the profession of teaching. It is an easy job that any simpleton can do. So ridiculously easy, that anyone being paid northward of $50k, and receiving retirement or benefits beyond that of a part-time Walmart greeter, should immediately be reported to Michelle Bachmanns planned Committee of UnAmerican Activities. I'm sure any teacher reading this is, at this very moment, performing the legendary ROTFLMFAO routine.
But for those who are like-minded towards HuncleMike's views, I post my response to him below. And I encourage you, as I did him, to accept my challenge. I triple-dog-dare you!
"@hunclemike. I love opinions from people with NO experience in teaching. Are you also a medical, nuclear engineering, and astrophysicist expert? But then, teaching is not on par with such professions. Being a ridiculously easy gig w/ equally ridiculous benefits, I'm curious as to why YOU don't teach? Are you against such things, or upset that YOU don't have them? I challenge you, and I doubt you have the courage to accept, to walk a mile in their shoes. Volunteer to teach...if you can."
TO WATCH THE VIDEO, AND READ OTHER RESPONSES, FOLLOW THIS LINK
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y59zZTzRE3w
And then began the explanation to an 11 year-old of how students from other countries in the world were fairing better than American students at math, science, reading, geography...well...every subject you can think of.
I exclaimed, "It is going to be very entertaining over the next 3-5 years, watching these imbeciles desperately grasp for magic-bullet solutions....false solutions such as extending the school year." (Finland and others ahead of us already go fewer days, not more, than American pupils. They also spend less money per student.) "Yes, all of the 'reforms' will aim at everything but the culprit of causality, and that is why they will all fail. For the real culprit is the total, complete, disdain, and venomous vitriol that people in this country have for education in general, and teachers in particular. What is 'broken' about education in this country, is the culture that surrounds it."
And so I headed to YouTube to reinforce what I already knew. Take a character named HuncleMike, posting in response to a video featuring Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey (if you search the good Governor's name and the word teacher, you will see how highly he values public school teachers). At the bottom of the video linked to this blog, HuncleMike states:
"Rita Wilson could benefit from a few months of starvation. She claims,"we love it, we love to teach" TRANSLATION: We love summers off, we love the ridiculous benefits, we love short work days, we love every blessed holiday off...most teachers I know bitch NONSTOP about how tough they have it."
This, friends, is the picture people have of the profession of teaching. It is an easy job that any simpleton can do. So ridiculously easy, that anyone being paid northward of $50k, and receiving retirement or benefits beyond that of a part-time Walmart greeter, should immediately be reported to Michelle Bachmanns planned Committee of UnAmerican Activities. I'm sure any teacher reading this is, at this very moment, performing the legendary ROTFLMFAO routine.
But for those who are like-minded towards HuncleMike's views, I post my response to him below. And I encourage you, as I did him, to accept my challenge. I triple-dog-dare you!
"@hunclemike. I love opinions from people with NO experience in teaching. Are you also a medical, nuclear engineering, and astrophysicist expert? But then, teaching is not on par with such professions. Being a ridiculously easy gig w/ equally ridiculous benefits, I'm curious as to why YOU don't teach? Are you against such things, or upset that YOU don't have them? I challenge you, and I doubt you have the courage to accept, to walk a mile in their shoes. Volunteer to teach...if you can."
TO WATCH THE VIDEO, AND READ OTHER RESPONSES, FOLLOW THIS LINK
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y59zZTzRE3w
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Education is Broken
Occam's Razor, usually summarized as, "The simplest explanation is most often the correct one," serves as a guiding principle in virtually all fields of science. But in education? Not so much.
The purpose of this blog, Alternative Edukation, is to examine education as a profession and approach the many issues in education from a logical, rational point of view...from the perspective of an everyday teacher in the trenches (read as: the opposite of what the Ivory Tower education bureaucrats do).
Following the aformentioned principle, what is the simplest answer? Most will say, "Well, there isn't a simple answer," but I couldn't disagree more. Education involves only four main variables: teachers, parents, students, and society/culture (ok...ok...I know, I lumped two of them together...so say five variables if you like). Just as there are families, communities, even states and nations, that are dysfunctional and not dysfunctional, what is it about our mix of "variables" that result in a poorer product than, say, Finland? Or South Korea? Or Switzerland? Or Norway? Or Lichtenstein? Wait...Lichtenstein? Really?
Laying all blame at the feet of the teachers doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of how all the different factors in public education interact. Don't get me wrong. I have seen my share of poor teachers, from the viewpoint of both student and colleague. But the current crisis in education is the literal embodiment of the old cliché, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink." Therefore, I dedicate to the teachers the first post in this series that will examine each of the variables involved in shaping a well-educated, young citizen of the United States of America.
Students simply are not interested in drinking what teachers have to offer.
The purpose of this blog, Alternative Edukation, is to examine education as a profession and approach the many issues in education from a logical, rational point of view...from the perspective of an everyday teacher in the trenches (read as: the opposite of what the Ivory Tower education bureaucrats do).
Following the aformentioned principle, what is the simplest answer? Most will say, "Well, there isn't a simple answer," but I couldn't disagree more. Education involves only four main variables: teachers, parents, students, and society/culture (ok...ok...I know, I lumped two of them together...so say five variables if you like). Just as there are families, communities, even states and nations, that are dysfunctional and not dysfunctional, what is it about our mix of "variables" that result in a poorer product than, say, Finland? Or South Korea? Or Switzerland? Or Norway? Or Lichtenstein? Wait...Lichtenstein? Really?
Laying all blame at the feet of the teachers doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of how all the different factors in public education interact. Don't get me wrong. I have seen my share of poor teachers, from the viewpoint of both student and colleague. But the current crisis in education is the literal embodiment of the old cliché, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink." Therefore, I dedicate to the teachers the first post in this series that will examine each of the variables involved in shaping a well-educated, young citizen of the United States of America.
Alt_Education?
People often use the word alternative when they want to describe something that lies outside the cultural, social, or economic norm. As an award-winning, innovative, public school science teacher with a hard-earned reputation for excellence in teaching, you know, one of those “good” teachers that parents lobby to have their children assigned to, one could easily say that my classroom is anything but normal.
But lately I find myself becoming more and more unhappy and disillusioned toward the craft I love. I'm cranky. I find myself saying things like, "Education...who cares?" I'm angry. "At what," you may ask? I'm referring to the prevalent nationwide belief that American public schools, and students, are failing solely because of the teachers. The idea that our schools would be the best in the world if it weren't for all of the idiot teachers.
But lately I find myself becoming more and more unhappy and disillusioned toward the craft I love. I'm cranky. I find myself saying things like, "Education...who cares?" I'm angry. "At what," you may ask? I'm referring to the prevalent nationwide belief that American public schools, and students, are failing solely because of the teachers. The idea that our schools would be the best in the world if it weren't for all of the idiot teachers.
In response to this movement, I must emphatically say, "Enough!" And it is this blog space, Alternative Edukation, that will serve as a venue of discussion for topics in education, especially as they relate to claims of our schools being broken. The "Alternatives" that you will read about here will be from a real teacher, with real classroom experience juxtaposed against the "mainstream" views of educational philosophy. Most of the accepted ideas about what needs to be reformed, e.g. extend the school year, place teachers on commission pay like used car salesmen, etc., are proposed by kool-aid drinkin' bureaucrats and politicians who wish to reform that which they know nothing about. Don't believe me? Then my first challenge to you is this: research the U.S. Senate Committee on Health, Education, Labor & Pensions. On the education subcommittee the majority of members have NEVER been employed by a public school...in any capacity.
Compared to a "mainstream" classroom, the education that students receive in my room is a better alternative. It is a better alternative to the critical-thought killing canned curriculum lessons that district administrators see are clearly not working, yet continue to use. It is a better alternative to the endless parades of worksheets from teacher resource packets.
The reason for the advantage is simple. The "mainstream" community (bureaucrats, politicians, as well as many teachers, principals, and superintendents) want to take something that is simple, and make it complex. Data, curriculum, EPSS, SQS, NCLB, NWEA, and endless other acronyms, policies, procedures, forms, forms, and forms, seek to muddle what was once clear.
But the alternative is what every great teacher knows: Educating a child is a team sport, one in which, currently, only one player is being blamed for losses. Instead, all players should ensure that they are doing their part.
And, perhaps even more importantly, to educate a child, the complex must be made not complex. Currently, bureaucrats with little to no experience in education are ensuring that this, too, is not being considered. Their answer is to make the simple complex, and things will get better. Sure they will. How's that working so far?
These are the secrets, the magical ingredients that once were prevalent in American classrooms: Teachers, parents, and community members all working together without the meddling of "experts" who have no experience in teaching.
But now, they are found only in Alt_Education.
Compared to a "mainstream" classroom, the education that students receive in my room is a better alternative. It is a better alternative to the critical-thought killing canned curriculum lessons that district administrators see are clearly not working, yet continue to use. It is a better alternative to the endless parades of worksheets from teacher resource packets.
The reason for the advantage is simple. The "mainstream" community (bureaucrats, politicians, as well as many teachers, principals, and superintendents) want to take something that is simple, and make it complex. Data, curriculum, EPSS, SQS, NCLB, NWEA, and endless other acronyms, policies, procedures, forms, forms, and forms, seek to muddle what was once clear.
But the alternative is what every great teacher knows: Educating a child is a team sport, one in which, currently, only one player is being blamed for losses. Instead, all players should ensure that they are doing their part.
And, perhaps even more importantly, to educate a child, the complex must be made not complex. Currently, bureaucrats with little to no experience in education are ensuring that this, too, is not being considered. Their answer is to make the simple complex, and things will get better. Sure they will. How's that working so far?
These are the secrets, the magical ingredients that once were prevalent in American classrooms: Teachers, parents, and community members all working together without the meddling of "experts" who have no experience in teaching.
But now, they are found only in Alt_Education.
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